Lose - Lose situation

Today I did something I swore I would never do, I have even been known to judge people for it... I'll think twice next time.

It's no secret the we have a lot of animals (2 big dogs and 4 cats), when I announced I that I was expecting many people's first question was "Are you getting rid of any of the animals?" It always made me really mad, of course I wasn't getting rid of any of them, they are family and I made them a promise to care for them for the rest of their lives. Most of them are rescues (except 2 sibling cats I got from a friend) and had a rough start to life, I never thought anything would make me change my mind. I was wrong.

During my pregnancy one of my cats, Freddie Mercury, started acting different and losing fur. No one has fleas, I tried vitamins & different food but nothing helped. After Minion was born, the hair lose got worse so I took him to the vet. He was tested for ringworm and other skin issues but all came back normal, based on that, his acting out and a few other things the vet (who I trust very much) suggested that he was jealous of Minion. I was very upset and didn't know what to do, I contacted the cat behaviorist at my shelter but none of her suggestions help. We discussed re-homing him but neither of us really wanted to and we also didn't know anyone looking for a cat so we were just dealing with it. Then he started hissing at Minion and I became really concerned, again we discussed re-homing him but still couldn't find anyone.

Then, just a few weeks ago, he scratched Minion on the arm. Minion didn't even notice it and it barely bled but that didn't change the fact that it happened. What if next time it's worse or his face or he bites instead. I can't risk that. I knew I had to bring him to my shelter and hope that someone would adopt him. I waited 10 days so that he would not need to be on a quarantine (which would significantly hinder his chances of getting adopted) and brought him in today. It was such a horrible drive to work with him in the passenger seat next to me meowing to be let out of the carrier. I cried during his entire intake and brought him back to his temporary cage myself, turns out I would be cleaning that room today. I was really upset about it at first but ended up being grateful because I could keep an eye on him and do my best to make sure he was comfortable. I asked he vet tech who was checking cats in (giving them their shots and what not) to please do him so that he could be moved to the adoption room ASAP for the big event we are having this weekend. I was petrified he would be out to sleep since he looks funny with the missing fur and can not go to a home with children. I was glad to be working alone today.

Around 1:30pm a member of our life savings department (they work with rescues to get animals out and run the foster program) came and told me he was being sent to one of our rescue partners. I cried again, I was so happy he was being saved but sad that I would never see him again. Going to a rescue means he won't be out to sleep and has a much better chance at being adopted. When the rescue came to pick him and the other cats they were taking up, I was able to pack him up and say my final goodbye (which of course made me cry AGAIN! He looked so sad and tried to cling to me so I just held him for a little while, but eventually the rescue had to leave so I put him in the carrier, told him I loved him again and wished his well. I also told him to behave so he came find an awesome home with no kids and plenty of affection.

It was a horrible day but I know that I made the right choice for him and Minion. Maybe now he won't be so stressed out and will stopped pulling out his fur. I'm going to think about him forever and hope that he's happy and doesn't think we abandoned him. We did everything we could to try and make it work but it just wasn't happening. My house seems quiet without him even with the other animals. I hope this is something I will never have to go through again.